Stop Dreaming. Do

I admire those who have courage
Those who have strength
Who have achieved

Achievement is based on hard work
Dedication
Something I lack
So many do

We all have dreams
Aspirations
The strongest people in the world
Are those who work towards their dreams coming true

Dear future self
Stop dreaming.
Do.

My week.

I don't even know what to write about. It's like, when I try and force myself to write, nothing decent gets produced. So instead of writing something from my own thoughts, as I usually do, or about someone else, as I haven't finished any of my interviews yet, I'm going to write about myself. I admit, this will probably be the most personal blog post I've written - (and probably the most boring!) I don't even know if I'm comfortable posting this. But I have nothing else to write about.


So this past week has been pretty huge for me. I've attended events, prepared and done tests, changed my appearance and have learnt a lot about myself. It's definitely been hard, but I've come out the other side feeling refreshed and stronger. I've gone from being inspired and excited about life to thoroughly depressed and upset and then back again.

Monday - Was incredibly tired but I studied hard and it was a good day.


Tuesday - Felt energised, also had a really good day at school. I then had parent teachers, in which, everything academic wise I'm getting straight A's, but a couple of teachers said that I have the potential to 'burnout' by the end of the year. I took on board what they said, but it still kind of blew my spirit. I was up til 12.30 that night tossing and turning, thinking about so much.

Wednesday - Was tired from all my thinking. Learnt a lot about the way I think and feel about myself and others. I also talked a lot about what I might do in the future. By the end of the day, after watching a very funny drama production, I broke down. I'd had such a big day, and so much building up, that after one mildly big fight, I absolutely broke. I felt so lost and depressed.
Thursday - I was still feeling pretty down, but having a full on day at school actually really helped me. I was so tired, so emotional, but I ended off having a good night.


Friday - Went to the dentist. Spent the rest of the day relaxing and catching up on tv. It was so nice having a day off just for myself. I then dyed my hair chocolate brown, and I think I actually like it :)

Today I'm somewhere in the middle, felt inspired but also kind of cold and depressed. I gave out amnesty badges whilst holding a sign saying "welcome refugees" and I then watched the Amnesty thing. There were speakers and musicians and it was a really great event.


Feeling such extremes in one week has been hard for me to handle. Tomorrow I will study a lot for my Japanese test. I'm back from where I was on Wednesday, but I still don't really feel content. I do feel stable for now, and hopefully it will continue.

A new idea.

Referring back to one of my old blog posts, I love to know how people think and act. I know so many people who have gained huge success in varying areas of life. I am so proud of the people I know who have been able to create success in their lives, and I want to know how they have done it. I am intrigued about what they did to achieve their successes.

So I’ve decided I want to start interviewing inspiring/successful people and featuring them in my blog posts. I will start off with people I know, and then perhaps (if I’m courageous enough!) I will get in contact with people who don’t know me, but that I still find inspirational.

It’s going to be a challenge as I’ve never really interviewed anyone before. I want to showcase their successes in a clear and beautiful way, as they deserve even more acknowledgement. I’m so privileged to know the people I do.

On another note – I’ve found my rhythm again! :) I’m back to being very organised in school and life. I’m motivated and my mind is flowing with ideas. My diary is currently full of things I want to achieve soon.

A change in my blog?

So I've going back and reading some of my old blog posts, and have realised that they are all about me and my views/beliefs. Which isn't a bad thing because it has helped me to understand what kind of person I am. To be honest, I've suprised myself. I look back and actually can't believe what I wrote a couple of monthes ago. It just doesn't even feel like it was me who wrote it.

Really I write to myself. Everyone has different styles of writing that they prefer reading. But it's impossible for me to please everybody, so instead, I write the way that I like reading - and hope that some people will like it too! This is why when I look back at my old blog posts, I can easily read them and enjoy them.

I can't even remember where this blog post was going, there was a point I was trying to prove, but I think I've gone a bit off topic. I think I've been trying to say that my blog has really helped me in a way that people can't, but I've also realised that perhaps it could help others who need more help than me. I haven't had any solid ideas on this, so I'll start on some brainstorming.

I've also been thinking about whether I should change the way I write my blog posts to make it more appealing to people - but I don't think I should, as it wouldn't be me.

Relationships

We are born into our families. We are loved unconditionally by them, whatever relationship we might have. The relationships we have with our family have the ability to be absolutely beautiful. But they are hard to maintain. We have no choice in which family we are born in to, but we at least we are loved.

Friendship is a relationship we form with people who we love. Great friendships are a beautiful thing. I'm not saying that it's a bad thing that we get born in to our families, but with friendship, you have some sort of choice. I think friendships are absolutely amazing and to find a true friend in life is very, very lucky.

I am lucky enough to have both an amazing family and beautiful friendships. Relationships give us strength and courage and let us feel loved. There are so many people in the world who don't have what I have, and for that I am truly sorry, but having the relationships that I do gives me the courage and power and try and help those less fortunate.

I have a best friend. She knows who she is. We have come to a point in our friendship where we just understand everything about each other. We know when we're feeling emotional (whether it be happy, sad, grumpy, etc.), and we can sense when we don't feel like doing anything at all. We hold mostly the same views on subjects and like to voice our opinions to each other. We help each other all the time. Best of all, we know how to have fun in a good and healthy way.

Unjust Stereotypes

So recently I've been picking up on groups of people being catergorized and stereotyped. There have been so many instances in the news lately where a new rule/law has been set in place that applies to a group of people. But some people actually do the right thing, or try to, and catergorizing them together in relation to their age/sex/race is terrible and unjust.

In so many instances, we don't know a person or their story, so how can we decide on things that will affect their life? (For example: a variety of people are in prison or therapy, for a range of reasons - doesn't mean we can catergorize them as a "prisoner" or being "in therapy" and hold the same view against everybody who is a "prisoner" or "in therapy."

I just hate how people can be put in the same catergory as someone and be treated the same - when the two people are in actual fact, completely different. We are all individual and have our own flaws, but we shouldn't be disadvantaged for someone else's wrong-doings.

At the same time, I can see how hard it would be for somebody to punish some but not others. It would take time and some would disagree with a decision made.

So, when a decision is made, should we let a problem slide away and continue to let people getting away with something...or should we create a new law and disadvantage some who fall into the same catergory as someone else, but has done the right thing?

Inner Debates with Myself.

So, I can't sleep.
Every night I toss and turn, and toss and turn, and toss and turn.

This happens because my thoughts are literally in overdrive. Every night I go to bed and try to get straight to sleep. But a good 10 minutes later, I will in the middle of an in depth discussion with myself. I've been told to try and right my 'worries' down before I go to sleep, so that instead of worrying about them - they'll be written down and dealt with the following day. And yeah, sometimes that helps if I'm worrying about something. But mostly I'm not!

I tend to have debates with myself over completely random things. Last night it was faith and Christianity. I have to fully weigh up both sides the debate - in last night's case, believers and non-believers. I then think about why they believe or don't believe, what benefits they get out of their desicion and how they go about being a believer or non-believer. *note - when I see 'believer' I am referring to a believer of God.

I have my own views on things. But I find I'm more interested in what people believe in, why - and what they have to say. The way people think fascinate me. And yes, sometimes I feel like people's views are utterly ridiculous, but other times, someone will say something that completely blows me away. And it is then that I appreciate the fact that I read so much and listen to people. Without the words that I have heard, I would not be who I am today.